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The Ego Has Landed

by Phil Nice

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1.
Sad Sack Cafe 04:09
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Sad Sack Café Sore heads and scrambled eggs At the Sad Sack Café Recycled coffee dregs At the Sad Sack Café Morning fog A hair of the dog To wash the bile away And by the way What day is it today? Sausage, beans, broken dreams At the Sad Sack Café Bad news, worn out shoes At the Sad Sack Café You didn’t come for company And the food is dressed to kill If the salmonella don’t get you Something else will We’ve all been sitting here so long We’re getting pretty long in the tooth Life is stale and dry as last week’s apple pie And flavourless as freshly unscrewed orange juice The strongest tea in history At the Sad Sack Café Deep-fat-fried misery At the Sad Sack Café The outside world looks better When you’ve sat here half the day My depression gets depressed And goes away
2.
Sue Me 04:42
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You say my trees are stealing your light Sue me You say my car is blocking your drive Sue me So what if I like to party all night? I’ll build my outhouse where I like If you don’t like it you can take a hike Or sue me I bought all the toilet paper in the store Sue me Yes, I’m expecting a third world war Sue me I’ve dug me my very own hole in the ground Gonna hide with my woman till things cool down I’d invite you too but three’s a crowd Sue me Why don’t you sue me? Take me to the cleaners Then hang me out to dry Sue me Let’s get legal I’d sure like to see you try Maybe I’m an anarchist Sue me One more sin for your black list Sue me I get going while the going’s good I never do what the hell I should If you think you own the neighbourhood Sue me I bought all the toilet paper in the store Sue me Yes, I’m expecting world war four Sue me I’ve dug me my very own hole in the ground Gonna hide with my woman till things cool down I’d invite you too but three’s a crowd Sue me
3.
Junkyard Dog 02:26
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You'd better do right by me I don't forgive just anything Tread on my toe you ought to know I'm gonna be a junkyard dog about it You better not yank my chain I'll never pussyfoot around Break my balls I ain't your fool I'm gon-na be a junkyard dog, watch out! I'll be the ni-cest guy in the wes-tern world if you tread real soft on my street Never said boo to a goose or moo to a moose But I'll be bar-king mad if you diss me You bet-ter say pret-ty please I'm not your door-mat in the hall com-mit a sin like bar-ging in I'm gon-na be a junk-yard dog, watch out No, I won't let go I got my teeth sunk in too deep So tired of me you'll leave me be I'm gon-na be a junkyard dog, watch out
4.
Wagon Rag 03:41
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5.
Second Fiddle 03:56
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Always in shadow Out of the gaze By default or design Spinning a thread Finding a way The one-eyed leading the blind Never the talk of the town Go for a swim Go for a drown Your absence unnoticed Well into next week A vital component Nowhere to be found Always the bridesmaid Never the bride Nowhere near the bouquet But pulling some strings In a corner somewhere Winning the day Then fading away You’ll live with a modest return Safe on a hilltop Watching Rome burn Famine or flood Rivers of blood You’re the cat in the middle Second fiddle Always passed over Never in line Somebody else got the points Stealing ideas To present as his own Mix up some poison Throw him a bone Don’t ask the bird in the gilded cage The guy with the letters after his name That sings for his supper Does what he’s told Go find the guy with the key to the gold Always in shadow Knowing your place Keeping the project afloat All those fragile egos Hitting the sauce Pour them into a taxi As a matter of course You’ll live with a modest return Safe on a hilltop Watch empires burn Famine or flood Rivers of blood You’re the cat in the middle Second fiddle
6.
Ruby Slippers 03:52
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You say you're looking for a brand new guy If you don't advertise, no one's gonna buy You're feeling lonely day and night It's no use getting all up tight Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do The party's not gonna come to you So put your ruby slippers on Two steps forward one step back Two at the door and one in the sack Look in the mirror, are you gettin fat? Pop some pills and drink some Jack Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do The party's not gonna come to you So put your ruby slippers on So let's party Let's party Let's party like they landed on the moon Let's party let's party it's later than you think No time left for doom and gloom Feels like the world has passed you by It'll all come again, so don't you cry I'll sit and wait on your front step And watch the stars while you get set Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do The party's not gonna come to you So put your ruby slippers on
7.
These Shoes 03:35
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They walked the streets of Paris Kicked up the dust in Rome And through the northern winter They braved the rain and snow These shoes have danced their final Shuffle, tap and step They’re about as sorry as a pair of shoes can get Their eyes are full of water Their tongues are hanging out Their soles are paper thin They yawn, they smile, they pout These shoes have seen the last of Puddles, mud and grit It’s time for us to call it quits They cooled their heels in Oslo Kicked up a fuss in Bonn And two Aegean summers They stretched out in the sun These shoes have stomped their final Rhythm on the stage The world demanded dues And these shoes have paid They were with me at my marriage They saw my daughter born They walked with me through hardship Through countless ups and downs If shoes could talk I know they’d Tell a sorry tale Of life at pavement height Of bugs and slugs and snails
8.
One Man Band 03:52
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I’m a one man band Out in the rain With a thousand melodies But not one dollar to my name I’m not feeling sorry No I’m living my dream Letting the wind take me I’m a troubadour Out on the street With thunder as accompaniment And puddles at my feet But I’m not feeling put upon No one’s lucky as me I get this all for free A rusty accordion My old tambourine Gotta travel light enough To run from the police All folks at rush hour Too stressed to notice me You’ll go back to your luxury And bore yourself to sleep Yes I’m a one man band Nobody to you With city grit in every pore And in my spirit too But I’m not complaining No, I’m living the dream Haven’t paid a dime in taxes Since last century
9.
The Gypsy in Me 02:44
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And when I listen to that song You’re humming as you walk along And hear the way you’ve got the beat Like it’s living in your feet That brings out the gypsy in me I wanna get you on that floor Amongst the sawdust and the straw And swing you round until we’re done We melt together till we’re one Oh, it brings out the gypsy in me Wanna dance and sing and swim in the sea Without a stitch upon my bones Away with every trace of melancholy I’ve never been so at home, so far from home Miles from stress and telephones When you light that joint and pass it round It’s like I never lived in town And to the pleasure of your tones Forget my mortgage and my loans That brings out the gypsy in me
10.
The Ego Has Landed 05:46
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You thought you were special It doesn’t mean that you’re not It’s a question of focus The big picture or the microdot It just doesn’t matter When you’ve rounded the hill Everyone’s headed For the same bitter pill You thought that it mattered It doesn’t mean that it don’t But is everything broken When things aren’t what you hoped? Didn’t get what you wanted Can you want what you got? Even if it was nothing The freedom to accept what is not Now the ego has landed It fell with a crash Common sense was stranded But now it all comes rushing back You never knew what might hit you While you’re carried away Now the ego has landed Now dawns another day I thought that I loved her It doesn’t mean that I don’t Did I learn not to show it Or set it adrift like a paper boat? But love’s like a mirror You like what you know All that admiration Hard not to let it show You thought it was easy It doesn’t mean that it’s hard And maybe the answers Are right in your own backyard And you could get lucky And your wishes come true But in the meantime start digging While you wait, it’s something to do
11.
No Way, No How, Nowhere 04:06
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Never a borrower or lender be No way, no how, nowhere You say, trust me I’ll wait and see No way, no how, nowhere Should I jump for joy and dance a jig? Invest my dough in something big? Is it lipstick on the same old pig? No way, no how, nowhere New financial instruments No way, no how, nowhere Earn in growing increments No way, no how, nowhere Show me one more get rich scheme The greatest thing since margarine A pipeline full of pipe dreams No way, no how, nowhere No way. I’m skeptical You’re twitching with your eye What is it that you’re trying to sell? Here’s a diet pill for a big fat lie This new thing you call a wheel No way, no how, nowhere It rolls around, is that the deal? No way, no how, nowhere That’s your latest get rich scheme The greatest thing since Vaseline That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen No way, no how, nowhere I want it all and I want it now No way, no how, nowhere But put in those ten thousand hours? No way, no how, nowhere I want the knowledge and the skill I want the view from on the hill Can I maybe get it as a pill? No way, no how, nowhere
12.
Nothing More to Say 03:46
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When the night time has descended And colours fade away When the sun completes its journey So ends another day When the clock has reached the top And the lovers go their way There’s just you and me together With nothing more to say When the drinkers are all drunken Their money in the till The final song has ended And everyting grows still The last to leave are leaving Their footsteps fade away When all that can be said is said There’s nothing more to say When the rain is through with raining And frost is in the air When my dreams just won’t obey me I’ll pretend that I don’t care When the bell has tolled its number And all has been in vain I’ll lay me down to dream my dreams again When the numbers have been counted The stories all ben told For you no happy endings For me no crock of gold The nightingales are all sung out Sleeping beauty just won’t wake Douse the lights and say ‘goodnight’ That’s all that’s left to say

about

All music and lyrics by Phil Nice
Produced 2016-2017 in Denmark and England
Phil Nice: Vocals, guitars, banjo, basses, keyboards, harmonica, drums and percussion
Trumpet and trombone on "No Way, No How, Nowhere" by Kevin Grenfell
Guest vocals on various numbers by Karen Nice, Kevin Grenfell, M.C. Hansen, Torben Kaas, Lars Harboe, Ulla Britt Simonsen

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released August 6, 2017

All music and lyrics by Phil Nice
Guest artists:
Karen Nice
Ulla Britt Simonsen
MC Hansen
Lars Harboe
Torben Kaas
Kevin Grenfell

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